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Ambrose Bierce, The Devil΄s DictionaryUS author & satirist (1842 - 1914)
Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)
Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
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